one for the season

tis the season to conspire. :)

Much Afraid

All of these things
I've held up in vain
No reason nor rhyme
Just the scars that remain
Of all of these things
I'm so much afraid
Scared out of my mind
By the demons I've made
Sweet Jesus, you never ever let me go
Oh, sweet Jesus, never ever let me go

I am reborn today. 

A fresh anointing. 

No more looking back. 

My life is Yours and Yours only. 

I will yield. This is all that I am, broken -  

It is in this desperation that I come to You, Lord, on my knees - frail. 

Much afraid. 

Oratio, Meditatio, Tentatio. ( Prayer, Meditation, Temptation) 

It is through our most heartfelt struggles that we realize how weak we really are - how much we need God - how we can never save ourselves, and what really is so SO amazing about grace. 

Abba, I need You now. 

 

The 23rd Psalm

Psalm 23

A psalm of David.

1 The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.

2 He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,

3 he restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness
for his name's sake.

4 Even though I walk
through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.

5 You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.

6 Surely goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever.

Amen.

Leap of faith

Things are moving, moving in mysterious ways and it's exciting!

it's funny how when you finally tune in to things around, when you finally moove with life, there's so much opportunities, so many good things.

Stagnancy is no good and sucks the soul out of you.
Change is in the air around the world, and change is in the air in these bones as well.

A fresh start, and a fresh hope!
I'm excited.

And this is just a 'blurb'. More articulate thoughts later, mayhaps.

whee.

Stuff you pass time with.

smooth e, smooth ee smooth ee smooth eeee..

Colorblind

I am colorblind
Coffee black and egg white
Pull me out from inside
I am ready (repeat 3 times)
I am taffy stuck and tongue tied
Stutter shook and uptight
Pull me out from inside
I am ready (repeat 3 times)
I am fine
I am covered in skin
No one gets to come in
Pull me out from inside
I am folded and unfolded and unfolding
I am colorblind
Coffee black and egg white
Pull me out from inside
I am ready
I am ready
I am ready
I am ready
I am fine
I am fine
I am fine
I am fine.

news that's not so schmancy

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
And I really wanted to have a quarter-life-crisis 'celebration' here.

boo.

Worlds Apart

Soaring on the wings of selfish pride
I flew too high and like Icarus I collide

I look beyond the empty cross
forgetting what my life has cost
and wipe away the crimson stains
"dull the nails that still remain"
More and more I need you now,
I owe you more each passing hour
the battle between grace and pride
I gave up not so long ago
So steal my heart and take the pain
and wash the feet and cleanse my pride
take the selfish, take the weak,
and all the things I cannot hide
take the beauty, take my tears
the sin-soaked heart and make it yours
take my world all apart
take it now, take it now
and serve the ones that I despise
speak the words I can't deny
watch the world I used to love
fall to dust and thrown away

Geek, eek?

So lately, I've been dubbed a 'geek'.
I don't find that all too flattering, i mean, you aim to be exciting, cool, funny, sensible - and a lot of other things, but geek?
Anyhoo, I just looked up 'geek' on wordweb and it says :
"A person with an unusual or odd personality",
"A knowledgeable and obsessive computer enthusiast"

. . .

I do not have much in my defense. ( gahh, I looked up WordWeb! )


. . .

What I definitely know is that my 'geek-o-meter' has increased like a lot lately, since I spend so much time online.
And like, uh, my favourite things in the whole wide world (wideweb) is Google and WordWeb, uh, and Wikipedia.

And I so totally dig(g) Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.
Btw, did you know the answer to life the universe and everything is 42?

Heh.

Okay, so this video below definitely fits into ultra geek-dom.
But what I really, really need right now is the Force.

No, really.
I need the Force.

A quarter is a half of a half

I think I am going through my Quarter Life Crisis.

Well when you start going online and looking up stuff like :
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quarter-life_crisis

and you start looking at books like :
Conquering Your Quarter Life Crisis

And you start identifying with some 'unknown's definition of 'The Quarter-Life' crisis.

- - - - - - -

It is overwhelming, hardly flattering.
I don't feel too good.

Change

and he won!


History has just been written.
And on the 5th of November.

heh.

:)

Remember remember the 5th of November

Remember, remember the 5th of November.

The gunpowder, treason, and plot.
I know of no reason why the gunpowder treason
should ever be forgot.

Schwim with me. :)

Just to unload.

1) The world holds its breath as America decides.
I secretly hope this will be one of those 'defining' moments in history. A giant 'leap' for mankind. America's first non-white President. I get a funny chill down my spine, a good one - it's of jittery excitement. Obama comes across as someone who can help effect change, and change for the better. Someone with enough intellectual aptitude and the fortitude to follow through. "Yes, we can!" Plus, it's about time we got a Michelle as a First Lady. Rar! :) I hope, for America ( and the rest of us ), they choose wisely.

2) I want a MacBook. I guess right now it's not so much of a need, but ouh. I want. :)
Maybe I should join this competition, and I think I would - and win myself one. Please vote for me and my pictures if you see it, thank you. :) Btw, the shoes are pretty cool. I should play badminton again. Just for the shoes.

ooh, this just in : I hear Mac's are much more affordable in Australia now... anyone coming back from there soon? =)

3) My dog Rocky has been given away. :( I miss the "punk", but we live in a multiracial, multicultured, multireligioned nation, and as my parents put it : "We chose the neighbours". I am still doubtful if it were the best choice. Ahwells.

4) I am thinking of getting HermitCrabs! After my good music loving boss pointed me to this.
I think I should keep them in the office, at our corner. At the desk where no one uses. It would be good refreshing eye-candy after all the cannot-be-good computer screen staring. Then we'll finally have office pets. Oh joy!

Oogay. Things that have been running about ( schwimming actually ) on the top of my mind.
Let's watch/read the news later today and see what happens.

" i got on zhier nerves, i zhon't know why.. "

zhis, zhis is amazing.
see if you get it.

" You were happy once; you were sunshine and smiles and a brightness that radiated. You may be cloudy now, you may not want to sing. You may just want to fold inside of yourself, on the oldest couch you can find, by the biggest window, and watch it rain.

You used to find that little things made you happy; now you can’t even find the big things. Somehow, along the way, you lost yourself.

One foot in front of the other, sweetheart, and you will find your way back."

Life, Passion, Dilemma?

Blogging from IBridge Camp at El Sanctuary.
We have internet! Whee.

Sam's giving the opening 'speech', and we'd be here at this chill-out place till Saturday.

A motley crew we'll have here.
Could be fun, heh.

Pictures later, maybe.

-m-

michelle's blog : "What I used to look like"

How my blog looked like right before it was wiped out : Click!

Google Cache! :)

I'm working at getting my blog back up, here or otherwise. Wait for it. =)
Meanwhile, I just downloaded Google Desktop - and I'm owned.

It's so amazing, you cannot imagine - especially for someone like me who's got like files everywhere everywhere.

Yayy.

This is where I'll be for the Raya break : ibridge.net84.net
Camp!

Life, Passion, Dilemma?
Come join me as I ( hope ) to get back on track in Malacca!
no, seriously -- come join me. Drop me a line and I'll tell you how.

Okay, till then.

The Waiting Room

Yes, I lost it all. Through some freak one-click accident.

I am, working at restoring it back - but it all depends on Blogger Staff kindness.

Please hope and pray with me, heh.

I've been blogging here for 5 years. It's a real big thing to loose.

For the rest of you, this might be good for you.

Sorry this post came late -- I've been busy trying to recover from the 'shock', as you can imagine - i had to blink and reblink when I first saw it, and when it finally dawned upon me I think the blood rushed up to me head and I got that ughy feeling of puking.

People have been kind and helpful, and I have managed to recover some posts through this Undelete, but they are not live and not here, and not complete -- and stuff.

If anybody knows how I can possibly get the posts, back , let me know.

I've already lodged a report/complain to Blogger Support so we'll see how that goes.

Meanwhile, it's always a learning experience, I guess - it better be! And maybe I need to change the twang of my blogspace a little.

Thanks for reading, and for caring.

Love,
mysh

this cannot be happening